Orphaned Fan of the NFL

Being a fan of American football, this is a great time of year. The season is finally here, it's still young, there are lots of exciting players/teams to check out, and there are still 18 more weeks of football left to watch! Being a native of Los Angeles, I'm an orphan-fan of sorts because we don't have a team here and haven't had one for a long time.

I won't call this a predicament because of all the real-life problems occurring on this planet right now: war, disasters, starvation, etc., but which team is an Angelino supposed to root for? We have no team. People out here seem to pull for the Oakland Raiders because they were our most recent transplant. They did a pit stop here for a few years ago as they played in the decrepit L.A. Coliseum. Yeah, they're Super Bowl champs; yeah, John Madden -- who is amazing -- had coached them, but I just can't get past the fact that owner, Al Davis kept legendary running back Marcus Allen on the bench in his prime just because he had a personal problem with the guy. Plus, they're from Oakland for god's sake...not L.A. Q: Who's my favorite team? A: Anyone playing the Raiders.

Some Angelinos cheer for the St. Louis Rams because they were in L.A. for so many years. But they moved to Anaheim, then bailed and ended up back in St. Louis. Plus, they're originally from Cleveland, so forget them. Another not-so-local team is the San Diego Chargers. I have lots of friends down there. They can keep their team all to themselves.

It looks like I'm going to have to be creative in choosing a team. Man, that hurricane just chewed up New Orleans. Maybe I should root for the New Orleans Saints...you know...the team without a stadium...the mega-underdog!! Naw...they don't want a "charity fan"... they're professional warriors. They eat guys like me for breakfast. I'll cross them off the list.

I can take the easy way out and root for the New England Patriots. They won three of the last four Super Bowls and they may very well do that again this season. Hmmm...too easy.

How about the Green Bay Packers? You know, Vince Lombardi, tradition, fun quarterback to watch. I love watching Brett Favre play! But now that I think about it, he either pronounces his last name incorrectly or has been spelling it wrong, and that's just wrong, so forget the Packers.

The Buffalo Bills are totally out of the question...they've had their chance over and over and over again. San Francisco 49ers? Been there; done that. The Atlanta Falcons have probably the most exciting quarterback to watch in lucky #7, Michael Vick. But he's about the only guy I like to watch on that team.

Dallas Cowboys? Who started calling them America's team, the same people that call Julia Roberts America's sweetheart? Next! Chicago Bears? That team is a religion to its fans, and I'd just be crashing the party.

I used to like bumble bees a lot when I was a kid, and the Pittsburgh Steelers are a real good team! I remember the Steel Curtain. I like the Steelers, but I'm not feelin' it. And I'm not going to be a fan of a team just because I think they're good. That only works for me with people, food and music. This is sports, and that would be a cop out. We don't need a logical reason to cheer on a team, especially here in L.A.

You know, I've been really enjoying watching the Philadelphia Eagles over the past couple of years. I've been a fan. They have seven players on the roster that start with "Mc" - but Donovan McNabb is the coolest to watch. Plus, the guy oozes class and sportsmanship which is important for me. They also have Terrell Owens, one of the most dynamic and fun players to watch in the entire NFL. He's also the most "misunderstood" (to use his words) players in the league. But I like this guy. Plus, their coach, Andy Reid, played football at Glendale College with one of my brothers. My other brother's wife's sister's husband is Andy Reid's brother. All that's gotta count for something, doesn't it?

Owens is the same guy that hid a black marker in his sock, and after scoring a touchdown, he pulled it out, signed the ball, and handed it to a fan. That rocks! Of course, the league fined him for it, but that made me laugh when he did it. The commissioner of the NFL never made me laugh. And since we're on the topic, it also made me laugh when Joe Horn pulled out that cell phone from behind the goal post after scoring a touchdown and made a call (he actually was not able to get a signal). I was entertained. It was worth the 15-yard penalty. It was even worth it if he got fined. It's a tax write-off, right?

Watching sports is a diversion for me. I want it to be fun, and I enjoy laughing and being entertained. If I want something more serious, I'll watch IRON CHEF.

GO EAGLES!